To help you out, here are the areas where I’d love your input:

• Best way to remove armpit hair
• Best exercise for flabby arms and stomach
• Quickest healthy meal
• How to wrap relaxed hair
• The essential spices for cooking most Nigerian dishes
• Least expensive way to call Nigeria (I think my current deal ($2.50 for 35 minutes) is ok but I wouldn’t mind something better)
• Best blemish-control regimen for the face
• How you keep up with your to do lists and get things done

In other news, I’m trying a new hair salon tomorrow morning for hair relaxing (I’m done with my old place). I’m hoping my scalp doesn’t get burned and I don’t get gouged financially! Ms. O and Bob-ij, I’m looking forward to receiving your recommendations for hair stylists in O-town!

Me? I relax my hair, and my scalp suffers. My hair care regimen is better than it used to be but still not perfect. I still sleep without a hair covering quite often. I need some silk scarves and my hair needs more moisture.

I was going to share pictures of my hair but I’m too embarrassed. Maybe I’ll get over that by the end of the entry, but I’d like to think that one or two of you have this idea of me as this polished, well put-together person (not even close to being true!) and I’m not sure I’m ready to shatter it.

Getting your hair done here is expensive if you go to a salon. I’ve never used the relaxer kits myself (my mom used to do it for me) and to be honest I love the idea of someone else working on my hair because having to wash and condition it is trouble enough (I know, poor me right?). The least expensive salon I can go to charges $68.25 to relax my hair. The other place I go to charges $79, and once last year, I paid $95 (please don’t judge me; it was painful to pay it), because I was hoping this more expensive place wouldn’t lead to a burned scalp (it did, but my hair had never looked better).

The lady I usually go to (Madame $68.25) is a usually pleasant, Ghanaian lady, but some of her business practices frustrate me:

The lack of organization
I never go to her salon without making an appointment; however, I think my sister and I are the only ones who bother to do this. Everyone else shows up willy-nilly, some waiting for hours (my sister waited for two hours once and she HAD an appointment!). They just camp there waiting. I’ll waltz in on time for my appointment and usually she’ll leave the person whose hair she’s doing and tend to me within 20 minutes because I always give her the “I booked an appointment” look. Inevitably, some of the people waiting will realize their day is half over and leave.

She needs to run her business so that clients are made aware that they have to book an apointment, and she needs to get an appointment book and keep it up to date. She should know it well so that when someone drops in, sans appointment, she can tell them that she has x amount of time available and that when the person who scheduled an appointment comes in, she’ll have to stop their hair and tend to that person. This way nobody’s time is wasted. She also needs to give better estimates of how long people have to wait because I’ve observed she’ll say 45 minutes when it’s really 2 hours.

Her phone skills
If the phone rings, she never hesitates to answer it and start talking, often animatedly, while continuing with my hair. I’m not sure why I find this so irritating, but I guess I find it hard to relax when she’s excitedly talking in an elevated tone of voice right over my head. I find it rude. It’s business time, not personal time, so I feel she should be focused on client calls.

She needs some sort of secretary/receptionist, who can answer questions about the hair products for sale, help a client send money to their relative/friend (she has a Western Union thing in her salon), and help customers who’ve just had their hair done pay for their ‘do, so she can focus fully on her current client. I understand that she may not want to spend the money on this, so what about a good voicemail system that she checks regularly, or maybe one of her kids, who are often underfoot, could do this. I think they’d learn a lot about dealing with people and gain some disclipline too if she had them answering the phone professionally, and doing small chores around the place. Instead the younger girl, who is undeniably cute and very personable, has grown spoiled (I’ve been going there for a while) and very used to getting her way. She expects clients to think she’s cute and coddle her when sometimes? You just want your hair to get done, pay for it, and get on with your day. You can tell she’s used to being adored and complimented by the older clients and just lives for it. Now that she’s at least 10 years old, the act is getting old.

Not making the client feel special
If someone comes in to buy hair products (which she also sells), or if the guy who cuts hair finishes with a client who needs to pay, she’ll leave your hair to go handle the transaction. Sometimes the customer has questions or needs guidance, so this isn’t always a simple and quick exchange of money. I sympathize with the fact that she doesn’t know this until she’s left my hair but it’s very annoying and adds extra time to my appointment. She never says “excuse me; I need to go ring in this sale”; she just leaves. And when things are running long due to questions, she never calls back to me that she’ll be right back. That is rudeness. And if someone should decide they need to send money to their cousin abroad via WU, she’s off again, leaving me rolling my eyes and sighing inwardly.

But I’ve dealt with these things for many years, complaining about it to anyone who’ll listen and to my sister, so that’s ok. But I’m tired. About a month ago, my sister went to do her hair. She said the hairdresser “hacked her hair”: usually she asks if you want a trim to remove the dead ends. My sister said she just wanted the dead ends off but she got her hair chopped and it really did. She lost way too many inches for it to be called a “trim”. Our hair barely grows so she was not happy.

Three days later I went to my appointment. I was kept waiting, I was forgotten and she really didn’t seem to care about what she was doing. My sister she felt the same way during her earlier appointment. Maybe she’s stressed or going through something.

When it was time for my trim, she cut my hair unevenly! I didn’t notice it but the next day at work, a colleague asked if I was rocking an asymmetrical style! I went to the bathroom and tried to see if maybe it was just the off-centre part affecting the length but it wasn’t: there is at least a inch of difference in length! I contemplated going back to get her to even it out but you know what would happen: she’ll trim a little off the left to even it with the right and suddenly the left will be too short. Then she’ll trim a bit off the right to match the left and before I know it I’m bald, and 25 years of growing my hair will be gone, just like that.

So, finally, I’m shopping for a new salon. One recently opened in my parents’ neighbourhood, but I’m going to do what some of my oyinbo friends do: I’ll meet with the hairdresser and make sure she knows my personal hair issues and what my hair goals are. Something about the way this new place is organized gives me hope that she’ll be that kind of hairdresser: the forever kind. I just hope she’s not too expensive!

Don’t forget: this blog is nominated in two categories in the Nigerian Blog Awards. To vote for this blog as Best Personal Blog, Best Personal Development Blog or both, feel free to click the links, which will take you to the polls.

I’ve said before that no one would guess that I’m Nigerian because I’m not stylish and I break many rules of stylish women everywhere. Let me list them by category:

H A I R

• I wash my hair every other day. I know most don’t but if I don’t my hair smells. I can’t explain it but this is my cross to bear.
• I go outside with wet hair (or at least damp hair, since I rarely have enough time in the morning to blowdry my hair to full dryness before leaving for work).
• I don’t have a “hair routine” that involves deep conditioning my hair weekly.
• I try to avoid putting oily products in my hair because I hate the feel of greasy hair. I think my hair (and scalp) hate me for this particular faux pas).
• In 30 years, I have braided my hair with attachment/extensions twice, yup, only two times in my life, and I have worn a weave once, for a week and a half. I’ve heard that weaves and braids are good protective styles so it’s a miracle that I have hair on my head!

So help me: I need one or two quick improvements I could make to my hair routine (I have relaxed hair). I’m blessed with quite healthy hair despite the havoc I wreak on it, but it is very dry and needs some moisture (but nothing greasy!). Please recommend some products!

M A K E U P

• I have worn foundation/coverup once in my life – for a wedding I was in. What actually turned me off coverup was a Nigerian girl in university: the collars of her shirts would be brown from all the coverup she was wearing, and the thought of hugging someone and having my foundation come off on their skin or clothing was unacceptable to me. So I always rock my natural, acne-scarred face – no concealers either. I also never wear lipstick.
• I rarely (maybe four times a year) wear eyeliner, so I never learned how to draw a fine line along my lashline. Other beauty products that I wear occasionally (once or twice a month): mascara, eyeshadow.
• I’m not pleased with my eyebrows (I’ll try to update with a picture): they’re naturally faint, and I think nice dark, hairy eyebrows (that you groom, of course) are essential to having a very “put together” face.

My mom and sister wear makeup daily and they wear it in a way that it enhances their natural gorgeousness, so all I need to do to is talk to them and learn how to make a five-minute face. I know there are some tricks I can employ to make my eyebrows look more defined. I may also talk to YNC because I love the way she did her eyes in this entry (lol there is a picture of her eyes in the entry; you just have to find it!).

C L O T H I N G / A C C E S S O R I E S

• When it comes to jewelry, I’m a fan of silver (or platinum – I’m not picky) over yellow gold, but I don’t wear a lot of it: most days I wear small silver hoop earrings that I’ve had for six years and a silver necklace. I try wearing rings but before I get to work I’ve usually removed it/them (maybe my fingers are only meant for wedding rings?). I have two silver watches that I rotate between and I don’t wear bracelets. I plan to experiment with new jewelry this fall, especially longer necklaces.
• I like my purses big and capable of holding everything including the kitchen sink I have a ton of black purses as I mentioned before. You won’t find any Coach, Louis Vuitton or even Guess bags in my closet. The only statement my purses are making is “I carry around a lot of stuff” or “I’m going to have back problems when I get older”.
• Clothing-wise, I don’t tend to follow trends because most of the trendy stuff look better on smaller girls or isn’t readily available in bigger sizes. My goal is to dress in a way that looks put together but also uniquely me, but I haven’t accomplished that yet. I don’t really have a personal style; that’s the problem. This fall, I have been wearing dress pants and a shirt/fine gauge sweater most days, which is fine, but it looks boring. I need to layer more, wear more fitted tops and bottoms and show my shape more. I must banish all loose-fitting clothing from my closet, and I need more skirts in my wardrobe!
• I have big feet that also happen to be wide. I want a great pair of long boots (a fall essential in my opinion!) that’ll also fit my calves. First stop is Zappos.

It can be costly to get that perfect closet full of clothing you just love to wear, but I think it’s something every adult should have, rather than having a collection of disjointed pieces that you have to figure out what to pair them with every morning.

Ok, your turn: what area (hair, makeup or clothing/accessories) are you slacking in? What area(s) could you teach a course in? Where do you find your inspiration for your own personal style?

I was contacted by the owner of Chicnicity LLC, the company launching Genevieve Magazine Online, to pass on some information concerning the launch of the online version of the magazine, and since I had read the magazine before and enjoyed it, it was easy for me to agree. For those of us who can’t run to the store and pick up a copy of the magazine for our very own, here’s the information on how we can have access to the latest copy of the full magazine from now on:

CHICNICITY LLC is launching Genevieve (the Leading Nigerian Fashion and Lifestyle magazine) online in an easy to read digital format. The digital format allows instant reading online at anytime and any part of the world.

CHICNICITY LLC will be offering 3 FREE EDITIONS that can be read instantly of Genevieve Magazine Online to visitors of http://goodnaijagirl.com and you do not have to subscribe to read the free editions.

All visitors who subscribe to Genevieve online for 1 year will receive an additional free edition and will be automatically entered in a raffle draw and are eligible to win various services and products for or by African women in the Diaspora (they include unlimited movie streaming subscription from Izogn Entertainment LLC, ethnic inspired leather bags from Tae, Genevieve tote bags and lots more).

Please visit http://chicnicityllc.com/ to READ FREE EDITIONS or SUBSCRIBE.

So, if you’re living outside of Nigeria, think about it, and if not, pass this information on to your friends or family members who are abroad (and who you’re tired of spending your hard earned cash to send the latest issue to by mail!).

My scalp. It gets burned. Every time.

Yes, I once made the rookie mistake of booking a hair appointment first thing in the morning, right after I had showered for the day, and the resulting pain around my hairline was understandable and almost unbearable. But even when I make my appointment for the evening, I still get burned badly. My scalp scabs and I have this compulsion where I must pick.my.scabs. I don’t even know how it happens, I just do. I have plenty of scars to show for it.

I take all the proper precautions yet still I suffer: I make sure I haven’t washed my hair for days (usually at least three) before my appointment, even though going that long without washing makes me crazy and paranoid because I’m sure my hair smells and I avoid standing in front of people and anywhere where a breeze might waft some unpleasant odour from my hair towards an unsuspecting person. I make sure my hair is dry and not the least bit wet. Sometimes I add some extra grease to my hairline the night before my appointment for protection’s sake (but admittedly, I’m not diligent about this). I’m not a fan of those petroleum-based hair products because I want my hair to be touchable but perhaps that’s the secret? My sister has been relaxing her hair for as long as I have and she rarely gets burned (and she loves her grease). Sometimes I request a gentler relaxer (but then my hair doesn’t get fully relaxed). I can’t win!

I don’t hear anyone else complaining about scabs or burning on their scalp but is that just because you’ve accepted that one must suffer for beauty and you guys suffer silently while I whine and behave like a three-year-old?

I’ve already determined that I can never shave my head because all the currently hidden scars would scare passersby-woe is me!