I’m afraid to put this in writing, lest you try to hold me to it but I want to promise to blog at least twice a week. I generally post once a week about the things that I feel led to thank God for, but that is just one aspect of this site. I have 34 draft posts on things that I want to share or get your opinions on. I haven’t forgotten the original purpose of this blog, which was to serve as a playground for my explorations of life as a North Americanized Nigerian, a term that to me means any of the following:
- someone born in Nigeria to (at least one) Nigerian parent(s), who has lived abroad (with or without family) for enough time that they have absorbed or had an opportunity to be affected by the culture of the country they now live in;
- someone born abroad to (at least one) Nigerian parent(s) who lives or lived with said parents for long enough to be exposed to Nigerian culture and feel like they behave differently in some ways from their non-Nigerian counterparts who are natives of the country of residence. (And I’m not saying that because you were born in a country your behaviour will be like that of everyone else born in that country.)
- any combination of the above, in various degrees. Perhaps you were born in Nigeria and have lived in and out of Nigeria for equal amounts of time over the years, for example.
So stay tuned.
Meanwhile, help me give thanks for:
My dad, who celebrated another year of life last Saturday. I am so thankful for him. He’s the most long-winded man I know (I fear he will put all my future wedding guests to sleep with his speech’s sheer length) but as I was listening to him last night and inwardly rolling my eyes, I was thinking of how much he loves to share knowledge and give people information he thinks they can use to their own advantage. It’s a trait I picked up from both of my parents and it’s one I really am pleased to have. If I come across something that I think can help you, I will almost kill myself to get the info to you.
Real friendships. There are a couple of people in my life that I am struggling to figure out what direction our friendship is meant to move in. I am one of those people that if I regularly talk to you or socialize with you, and share parts of my life with you, you cannot be an acquaintance. It therefore really bothers me when I don’t feel like I’m receiving that same level of confiding, trust with serious issues and realness back from them. It’s the latter that’s most frustrating: doesn’t anyone know how to just be their imperfect selves anymore? Maybe being real is going out of style? No problem, I was never in style!
But the good thing is the friendships where I doubt the commitment of the other party make me appreciate the friendships where I know my place and feel trusted even more.
Safety and protection. Living on my own, I feel safe coming home at 3am as I do when I come home at 6pm. It is nice to not be fearful and I hope I continue to feel secure and safe on my own. And although it sounds clichÃ©d, many people walk out their front door and never see the door again. Sometimes when I get home safely after a regular day, I will say “thank you God” without thought, and I don’t think I’m fully recognizing or dwelling on what a gift it is to live to see another day, and live to cook another over-peppered and under salted meal (someone help me o!). It’s only when I have a moment to be quiet and think on all the good things in life that thoughts like this come deliberately to mind.
Because of these posts, it may seem that I’m thankful the majority of the time, and I don’t dwell on things I can’t change for too long, but that isn’t the case. I think I have become better at looking for the silver lining as a result of writing these thankful posts, but I still spend too much time feeling discouraged, disappointed, lost, unsure and overwhelmed. I am reminded of that bible verse, “In everything give thanks” because of the huge challenge it issues to Christians: In everything? Really? I should give thanks even though my love life isn’t as I hoped it would be? Even though I have questions about my career? Despite my worries about the health of family members? Even though…you get the message. But yes, despite these things that upset or frustrate us, we are to remember to give thanks to the One who brings us through each and every situation we face. That is not an easy verse to live.
Enough preaching. On my way into my house, I noticed a creature sitting very still on the sidewalk. I ran into the house and grabbed my camera, sure that by the time I returned it would be gone. But it was still there! I realized I didn’t have the most ideal lens on the camera so I went back in the house for it and came out again. And again, the creature was still there. And here it is…any guesses as to what it is (it’s not a trick question and I do know what it is. You can click on the picture to make it bigger)? Sorry for the low quality picture…I don’t know how to use my camera at all. I suffered for this picture though: I received at least five mosquito bites for my troubles.