Finding a good Nigerian man

I won’t lie: you are going to hear a lot about this topic if you choose to stay around.

Because I live in Canada, and not in a part that has a lot of Naija men, my friends have asked me over and over again why I think I’m going to marry a Nigerian. I have the same answer for them: I don’t know, but I always imagined that I would. Want to hear more about what I hoped for? In my dreams I’d meet someone who had lived in Nigeria longer than I, perhaps even gone to highschool there, or done a college/university degree there. The reason this is important is so that when I go to Nigeria to visit, I could go with someone who knows their way around. I see this boyfriend/husband of mine helping me increase my knowledge of Nigeria, laughing or mocking my mispronunciations of words and correcting me when needed. (This might be a good time to mention that I grew up reading fairytales and reading romance novels).

My Nigerian heritage is very important to me, and although my parents had all their children in North America, I like that all of our names are Yoruba. It is my hope that when I have children, I am able to give them good Nigerian names so they never forget where they came from.

But enough about my non-existent children, since my husband is nowhere to be found (yet). The question is where does a girl who lives in oyinbo-ville meet a Nigerian man?

I’ve been told to look at church, but I don’t go to a Nigerian church (ie Redeemed Church of God), and I can’t justify leaving the church I’ve attended for most of my life because of a guy who may or may not be waiting for me there. I don’t think God would like my motives.

Online dating
Everyone’s doing it right? Well I gave in and I actually signed up on a site that catered to Nigerians in 2006 or early 2007 and I was not impressed. First off, the site design was horrible and looked like it was made my a child. I mean seriously: why would a Nigerian dating site be pink and purple with cutesy happy faces? God help us!

Despite indicating very clearly that I was interested in meeting Nigerian males (it was a dating site for Nigerians specifically) who lived in North America or the UK, I was contacted by guys from all over the world, with 95% of them living in Nigeria. When I very firmly told them that I was interested in meeting Nigerians in North America, they would tell me that they are planning to move to Canada very shortly. Rude Naija girl that I am, I told them to call me when they get here. I didn’t last much longer on the site after that, and I haven’t found a good site since.

I did meet a Naija guy from that site, one that lived in my city but that is a story for another day. Needless to say we never went beyond a two meetings.

Online forums
Not to be confused with a dating site, forums give you a chance to chat with people who have similar interests, or who are brought together by a common bond. I am only a member of one Nigerian forum at the moment but I know of TalkNaija, NaijaRyders, Nairaland and NaijaYouth.

Forums are full of drama, especially the ones with a younger age group, but I think it’s also possible to meet someone interesting on there. I haven’t really explored this much, mostly because the guys around my age on forums are usually already married or dating, and the unmarried ones are young, immature or both. Perhaps it’s time to start looking for a new forum.

Oya, help a sister out. Where can I meet a good Naija man?

10 thoughts on “Finding a good Nigerian man

  1. Gosh, I wished you lived in the United States, my sisters husbands have so many fuiine friends that meet your criteria. They've tried to set me up a time or two, but as it stands I'm too "American" for these men. Their loss.

    As you can see, I'm having a ball reading your archives. Wish you were closer, I'd definitely invite you out for a drink.

  2. online forums will only confuse you. You wanna marry a Naija G? Then you have to be ready to do things the naija way. Take a trip to Nigeria and meet real Nigerians. Forget all those lost sons roaming the world looking for money. U can only undastand a Naija man when you look staright into his eyes and ask straight questions


  4. Pingback: Finding a good Nigerian man :) |

  5. Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there…to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out whom you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be but when you lock eyes with them; you know that every moment they will affect your life in some profound way. And sometimes things happen to you at the time that may seem horrible, painful and unfair, but in reflection you realize that without overcoming those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, will power or heart. Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of good luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere. Safe and comfortable but dull and utterly pointless-the people you meet affect your life. The successes and downfalls that you experience can create who you are, and the bad experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are probably the most poignant and important ones. So if you’re seriously looking for a God fearing man to get to know, you have found me. I am glad to meet you too{}08122799889

Comments are closed.