Love and Learn – God-given roles in the relationship

Men like to pursue women, and they like to lead (well, most of the time). The bible designates the man as the head of the household; this is his God-given role in the relationship. However, the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding puts things in perspective: if the man is the head, the woman is the neck, and she can direct the head anywhere she wants to! A smart woman will realize that she can wield quite a lot of control as the “neck” of the relationship (but she must always be careful to use her power for good, not evil; if she strives to be a Proverbs 31 (verses 10-31) woman she will be just perfect!). Who wouldn’t want to be respectfully pursued by an appropriate fellow? Looking back on the few examples where I was approached by a guy I found interesting, I noticed that I probably made … Continue reading

Thankful Thursday – protection and celebration

I thank God for protecting my mom and sister during their three weeks’ stay in Nigeria (they returned this past Monday). I’m thankful that their health was not compromised during the trip; things can change so quickly so I don’t take any of this for granted! I’m also thankful that the four of us who remained in Canada are all fine too (the only mishap I’m aware of is partial flooding of part of my parents’ house, but that is being taken care of). My dad celebrated his birthday yesterday and I’m thankful that he reached another milestone. He’s an incredible man and even though our relationship isn’t perfect, I’m glad he’s my dad. I’m so thankful my friend and her husband were not injured in the car accident they were in last week (hit by a careless driver). The car was totaled but their lives were spared. They just … Continue reading

Love and Learn – Introduction

I’m starting a new series called Love and Learn, to share lessons I’ve learned as a single woman searching for love. I’ve talked about seeking a good Nigerian man from the start and four years later I’m still searching! I’ve tried online dating (both a site geared toward Nigerians and a general site), and I’ve been set up by my mom’s aunt, my great-aunt, who seems to have a never-ending stream of bachelors to throw at me. So far I haven’t been successful (if you define success as getting to the altar like I do), but I’ve learned a few things and Love and Learn is how I’ll share them! If you’re a single person going through these same things or if you’re on the married side of the fence, but can remember what it was like “back in the day”, then I hope you’ll chime in. How I came … Continue reading

Tricky Yoruba names abroad

I’ve talked about Yoruba names that make it hard to live abroad before but it’s been almost four years and there are more names to add to the list. From my earlier list, Bimbo is definitely the most challenging name because of the negative meaning behind the word bimbo , at least in North America, but I’d love to hear how the Bimbos in the house handle this. I know one who goes by his full name (Abimbola); maybe some shorten it to Bim? More Yoruba names that cause confusion or mispronunciation outside of Nigeria. Funke This is misprounced as funky or funk (silent e). I guess it’s not a bad thing for someone to think you’re funky, but if they think you’re in a funk, that’s not so cool. Joke This is the name of one of my favourite cousins but obviously North Americans reading it will think it’s … Continue reading

On finding my blog’s purpose

My last entry was about the steps I’m taking to figure out my life’s purpose but I briefly mentioned my blog’s purpose too. Have you ever thought about why you blog? I do, because I don’t just want to be cluttering up the web for no good reason. Another good reason to be clear on your blog’s purpose is that if you want to one day monetize your blog, a blog that has focus will be easier to monetize than a blog full of random posts. As I thought about this blog, these are the themes that came to me. Forum for Nigerians to interact When I first started this blog I wanted to create a forum where Nigerians–those born and raised in Nigeria, those born and raised abroad, and everyone in between–could interact and learn about each other and more importantly from each other. There are so many topics … Continue reading

On finding my life’s purpose

No Thankful Thursday post today: I’ve been thinking a lot about this blog and its purpose, and my purpose on this beautiful earth. You’d think I’d know my life’s purpose based on all the self-help books I’ve read, the Oprah Lifeclass I attended earlier this year, and the seminars I’ve attended, but I don’t. I’m dissatisfied with my life (yes, you can be grateful and thankful for all the blessings you’ve received yet still be dissatisfied with things, generally speaking). I constantly feel like I’m not where I want to be, and like I don’t know who I truly am. I’m certain that once I know my life’s purpose, things will become easier because I’ll be able to measure anything I think of doing against this purpose and if it honours that purpose, then I’ll do it. If you can relate to my feelings, a book that’ll help with this … Continue reading