Questions for the unfulfilled

First off, Happy Birthday to Maggielola, the awesome woman behind Worship and Swag! May God continue to bless her hustle and her life as she shares her message with the world.

My birthday is less than a week away, and there’s nothing like an upcoming birthday to trigger introspection. Around this time for the past few years, I crave alone time to spend thinking about my life. I mostly think about how I’m not where I thought I would be by this age, and to be honest I get frustrated and upset about it. I know that beating myself up mentally won’t change things, so I shut down the pity party as soon as it begins.

The questions I’ve been asking myself are:

What do I want?

What’s holding me back?

How do I change?

The answers to these questions are inspiring, depressing, and daunting, respectively. I wrote a longer blog post breaking down answers to the questions but I decided not to post it because the only response you could have after reading it would be Jummy: get off your butt and just get stuff done, yo! Geez! This has to be the last year I spend with these thoughts.

If you’re great at getting things done, I mean hard things that take months and maybe years to accomplish, how do you keep going? What is your key to success?

16 thoughts on “Questions for the unfulfilled

  1. I believe very much in action more than words and get a little irked when people talk about stuff and dont do it. So i try not to be a hypocrite. when i think of stuff and decide to do it, I mostly likely get it done. The key for me is not procrastinating because that leads to more procrastinating.I think when you think of something you want to do just get it done asap or in that moment so there is no room to rationalize or talk yourself out of it.

    have a great weekend.

    • Amen, sister—thank you for this. Unfortunately I’ve been more about talking than doing, and this is a serious problem. It’s one of the reasons I decided not to post my original blog post where I detailed each of the areas that need work in my life.

      Procrastination is my personal jail and action is the only way out; you’re right. I was hoping for a magical solution but it’s always going to come down to Just Do It, isn’t it?

      I need to be more action-oriented—thanks for the timely reminder and have a great weekend too!

  2. Wow thank you!! I’m humbled, and wish you a terrific birthday in advance. You know I would wanna answer these questions but I haven’t “arrived” yet. However, I’m willing to trash out some of these limiting beliefs with you during our mastermind session! :)

    • You’re welcome—I hope you had a wonderful birthday, Margaret!

      I’m sooooooo looking forward to our session!

  3. Not sure any of us has got the whole doing hard things successfully thing figured out but I suspect for those who manage to chip away at the difficult things and make progress do so by trying to decouple the issues into small(er) more manageable ones, and suiting up for the long hard slog involved…

    No easy answers GNG..

    • Hey there; great to have you here; thank you for commenting!

      I suspect you’re right about the value of breaking down a big goal into smaller pieces in order to get it done. There’s just no getting around it!

  4. In addition to what the first person that made comments said, my personal life success tips includes maximising time.
    Time is life! When we waste time, we waste life.
    Efficiency is doing things right while Effectiveness is doing the right thing. You see, it is not enough for us to do things right, we must ensure that we are doing the right thing. Plan each day the previous day so as to be in control of your time. Then when the day comes, you can make better choices between what is urgent and what is truly important. Dont be carried away with other people’s timing. Follow through and get done what you identified to be done within a defined and specific time, I call that being FOCUSED,even when your contemporaries feels and says it not yet time to get that done as far as they are concerned! From experience, they will come back to you to guide them on how to get there. Dare to take the lead!

    • Thank you for this comment, Sammy Tee! There so much to digest within it and I can see the sense in it. I am very unfocused and I do waste a lot of time.

      “Don’t be carried away with other people’s timing” Yes, I need to work on this. In fact I have work to do in all these areas. God bless you.

  5. Hello Jummy and happy (almost) birthday!

    What I tell people is that the sub-conscious plays a huge part in how our lives are. If you say you want something, but find it difficult to motivate yourself to achieving it, it may be because deep down you don’t really want that thing. Of course many things are beyond our control, but I personally feel like our real desires and our society-approved-should-be desires can be as different from one another as possible. In my amateur psychotherapist mind, success comes when ignore societal “desires” and do what really truly pleases us.

    Not sure if that makes any sense, but I hope it does!

    • Hello Clara! Thank you for the comment and the birthday wishes!

      There’s some good food for thought in your comment. I’ve actually asked myself that before, whether I actually want what I say I want. Let’s take weight loss for instance: I would absolutely love to lose a certain amount of weight but I don’t want to go through the pain of the hard work required to get there—that’s the truth of the matter. So if someone said I could pay a sum of money and healthily find myself at that weight I’d jump on it.

      So, laziness is at play and I’m focusing on the pain of the process rather than the gains and the advantages of the process. At some point I have to just accept that life wasn’t meant to be easy and just be disciplined and focused…right?

  6. Girl, you have to make up your mind to just do it. Find a way to achieve your goals that don’t seem too daunting – a little bit at a time. Slow and steady wins the race innit?

    If there are things you want to change, e.g. “weight” you have to make choices all the time – “Do I want to drink this glass of juice/soda or do I want to drink water/tea to help lose 5 pounds?” or “Do I want to sit and watch this TV show or do I want to walk in place while watching and lose 5 more pounds?” or “Do I want fried plantain or do I want to cut calories and eat it baked or boiled?”

    You have to make some changes if you want a change in your life. You can’t keep doing the same things over and over and think any change will happen.

    My two cents.

    • Well said and all true. I have to give up trying to find a no-stres, easy way of making things happen…nothing changes unless I do.

      Thank you for “telling it like it is”, Berry!

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