Unexpected: Long-distance courtship

When I last shared from the Unexpected series a million years ago, my mom and I were on our way home from a trip to Nigeria in 2016 during which I had met Sayo for the first time. By the end of the trip, we’d decided to enter into a long-distance relationship. I wanted to keep things about Sayo quiet back home, even with my family, because I didn’t know if things would fizzle as quickly as they’d started.

After spending four blog posts outlining what happened in those first couple of weeks that we spent together, I’m going to cram most of our time apart into one blog post.

My mom was bursting to tell my dad, sister, and brother-in-law that I had met someone. She tried to get me to break the news with meaningful glances while we were updating them on the trip but I didn’t. Finally, she said something like Continue reading

Four situations single people should avoid

I was recently convicted of the necessity of being careful when it comes to forming emotional relationships with members of the opposite sex. Like you (I will presume), I deeply respect people’s relationships and do not deliberately try to drive a wedge between a couple, but sometimes those of us with the best of intentions can inadvertently cause problems. I haven’t wrecked any homes (thank God!) and to make sure that never happens, I watch my interactions and check my intentions to avoid inappropriate emotional connections with men.

So, what am I really talking about? Continue reading

Thankful: January 2014

The first month of 2014 is drawing to an end you know what? I’m glad I’m still here! We are not guaranteed another breath so when we get to breathe and continue living, we have to appreciate it. I thank God! I’m glad that an event for the Nigerian Blog Awards that had been in the works for months finally took place earlier this month. What a relief! Even though there are still elements to sort out, the hard part is behind me. I had my annual doctor’s appointment last week and I thank God that things are okay. There’s room for improvement but I have a clean bill of health. The doctor is wonderful (I’d break my own rules and propose to him if he wasn’t already married with three children). He’s kind, warm, and he really listens (excellent bedside manner, and the only beside manner I’ll be getting … Continue reading

Alternatives to online dating

After some disappointments in matters of the heart last year and this year, I’m ready to try again and I’ve been thinking about my strategy. When you’re 34 you definitely need a strategy: sitting at home looking cute will not do the trick, and if I’m honest, while I do the “sitting at home” part extremely well, the “looking cute” part could use some work! ;) (Don’t worry, I have a “few” suggestions on how I could improve my appearance–har har.) My strategy at this time won’t include online dating, even though I know that online dating works: over the past ten years I can name four friends who met their spouses online. If I thought a bit harder I’m sure a few more names would come to me. But it doesn’t feel like the right option for me right now. As one of my friends said recently, “online dating … Continue reading