You won’t believe this…or maybe you will.
First, let me come clean: I am currently listed on two online dating sites, Meet Nigerians and Afrointroductions. I joined the latter site on January 20 and I joined Meet Nigerians on February 18. I also joined match.com for their seven day trial, and was on that site between February 5 and February 11. My profile is actually still on that site but if I want to do anything I have to actually subscribe (pay).
Afrointroductions is full of men in their late 30s, 40s, 50s and (yesterday) 60s who message me thinking, perhaps, that I believe that age is nothing but a number and would be flattered that a man 15 years or more older than me is interested in me. Most guys on MN who have shown interest are the right age but live around the world or something. Or they have really annoying profiles like the ones I shared before.
Last week, I received two emails from match.com saying that I had received a message on match.com. As a teaser, the emails said the following:
Someone emailed you! Look how much you have in common:
* He is a Christian.
* He doesn’t smoke.
* He is Black or of African descent.
* Both of you are the oldest child.
* He has no children.
* You both find boldness or assertiveness a turn on.
Naturally, I was beyond curious to find out who was emailing me, but for that honour I’d have to pay $34.99 to sign up for a month of match.com, or I could pay $19.99/month for three months, or 16.99 and sign up for 6 months. Curiosity almost killed this cat and I had pretty much decided that I would sign up for one month, but I asked two people if they thought it was a good idea: one was an oyinbo friend who is fond of online dating and I was sure that he would say yes. Instead he said “jeez, that’s a lot of money”. The next was Nnenne and her reply was “that’s too much”. That was two negatives so I didn’t sign up.
Then I received a message on MN that I thought was a bit overboard. This is what it said:
I feel fulfilled writing this short note to you..I came accross your profile and liked it so much..I am an easy going man,loving,caring,calm,,mature and understanding..i am seeking for a sweetheart…soulmate,..”Queen of my heart,”..a good woman to love..someone who is more caring and loving and understanding and fun to be with..I am not into games.and dont have the time either…i want a good and mature, understanding woman in my life..Anyway if you are the Queen i have been searching for.Lets give it a chance to manifest..email me so we can contact.my email is [deleted]…or contact via phone.[deleted]
hugs and kisses
I didn’t even bother responding, though I would have eventually sent something along the lines of “thank you for your interest but I don’t think it will work”.
So, last night I received a notification on Afronintroductions that some guy had messaged me. The email was similar to the one above but I didn’t even notice that at the time. All I noticed is that the guy was in the same country and province as I was, was only a couple of years older so I messaged him back. We talked a bit online then he asked me to call him. I said he could call me if he wanted to but I wasn’t going to call him. So he called and we talked a bit. He asked for more pictures and I said I had two pictures up on the site and he only had one so he should send me more pictures. He sent me a couple of pictures and that’s when it clicked: he was the guy on MN whose message I hadn’t responded to! I asked him and he confirmed that it was him. He said he emailed me on match.com too and I didn’t reply, he messaged me on MN and I didn’t reply and so he really didn’t think I’d be responding to him on Afrointroductions and was pretty surprised that I did.
So the emails that I was going to pay $35 to read? They were from him.
I guess he should get points for not giving up, but now I’m wondering if he’s some sort of stalker fellow. Or were we meant to meet? He seems pretty normal by phone but who knows, right?
We’ll see how things go. This good Naija girl will be taking it very slow and be very careful.